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Trailer Park Thursday: ‘Cars 3’, ‘Death Race 2050’, ‘Rings’ & More

A pair of horror-filled previews, a big ole slice o’ exploitation, a raucous comedy, and another baffling Cars 3 teaser. What more could one want from a new onslaught of trailers? Shh, don’t answer that! Regardless of what previous you might have been hoping would be encompassed under that “& More” portion of the article title, you’re just going to have to be happy with what we’ve queued up for you below….

Well, umm, yeah, that’s a Cars 3 teaser. Question: who are they trying t sell this movie to? Clearly not actual Cars fans, as if that were the case, Lightning and Mater shenanigans would be all over this and the previous teaser. Perhaps they’re trying to assure parents that this will be a very different kind of sequel? Even if that’s true, they’re going about it an odd way, as parents are still going to be irritated. Why? Because they’re going to have to explain these odd teasers to their Cars-loving kids. There’s also the possibility that they are attempting to entice non-Cars fans, but let’s face it, that’s not going to work. This is the third film in the series. If people weren’t on board with the first two, they likely couldn’t care less about this one. I remain utterly confused.

Malcolm McDowell, satirical exploitation, Roger Corman, vehicular carnage. and Manu Bennett (Arrow, The Shannara Chronicles). What more could one ask for? For all of them to be delivered is a sleazy (and appropriately cheap) Death Race package, that’s what! The latest incarnation of the vehicular manslaughter-happy saga is upon us and I thank the gods that Death Race 2050 exists. This looks like a big ole heap o’ dumb fun and I’m ready to just lay down in the middle of the road to let it do its thing. Is it January 17th yet?

Nursery rhymes and horror movies tend to blend well together, so kudos to Paramount for going that route here. Will it be enough to entice the masses to come out in support of this horror property once more? Things didn’t pan out too well in that regard for Blair Witch last year, but perhaps Samara and her Rings will have better luck than her Burkettsville-dwelling surrogate sister? We’ll find out soon enough.

Now here’s a fright flick that has built up a nice reputation on the indie horror film festival circuit in recent months. Zombie movies are a dime a dozen these days, but given that 2016 still managed to deliver us a new classic within the subgenre (Train to Busan), there’s always room for more quality zombie tales. Here’s hoping The Girl With All The Gifts has what it takes to stand out in a sea of failing, flesh-eating fodder.

Last on deck, we have ourselves a comedy! This yarn of yucks stars J.K. Simmons, Emile Hirsch, and Taran Killam, among others. I’m a bit burnt out on the “mismatched pairing has a super zany all-night adventure together” subgenre, but perhaps this one will manage to standout from the crowd? With talent involved, I’m sure at least a few laughs with be elicited from All-Nighter.

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